Wednesday, May 23, 2007

Oh, Canada...

Last week, a 200-page Conservative party playbook on how to disrupt and control House of Commons committees mysteriously fell into the hands of the National Post. [...] The excerpts that the Post republished read almost like [sic] corny self-help book. It tells committee chairs to "use negative body language," when it is appropriate to engage other committee members with humour and when it's not. [...] all you have to do is follow these simple universal Tory principles.

1. Remember, if you mess up, it never happened. Love is never having to say you're sorry, just Tory.

2. If someone gets in trouble, it's Peter's fault. Peter MacKay is a master of soundbites and probably a better politician than you, so don't be afraid to hide under your desk and let Peter do the talking for you.

3. If someone questions the war you say "So you want the Taliban to win?" War is hell. War is messy. But even worse - war is something Stephen Harper can't control.

4. Declare historical victory even when you lose. Voters like confidence, even if it's delusional... Never, ever say you failed. This is similar to Rule No. 1.

5. Never underestimate the power of threatening arrest.


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